How to ruin an amazing performance

I'm huge fan of Sting and The Police, and I'm also a huge fan of John Mayer. Few musicians have shaped and influenced me as much as they did, so I was psyched to see that they actually had a small performance together.

July 7th, 2007: All over the world Live Earth takes place, a gigantic event where festivals located in a dozen cities are held, with an insane amount of famous performers and an enormous audience. This costly and absolutely eco-unfriendly attempt to raise awareness of global warming was as counterproductive as one might imagine, but it did house some interesting musical acts.

Just the fact that The Police were together on stage - having just started a reunion tour that year - after more than 20 years was a freaking milestone for me. But when I saw who played the famous opening riff of Message In A Bottle, I squeaked with joy: John Mayer was with them on stage, playing along the main riff. I watched in awe and thought to myself that nothing could top this performance of the song.

And then came the 2:15 minute mark.



Urgh. UURRGH.

What the HELL is fuckin Kanye West doing on the same stage that The Police is standing on? Well I can tell you what he does:

He tries to improvise some juicy rap antics (I'm sendin' a message in a BAAWWWTLE, they said that we need a nu TOMAAARRROW ).
He whirls his hands around a lot.
He throws in lots of YEA YEAs and UHN UHNs.
And, probably worst of all, he actually tries to rap along to Sting's singing, backing vocals style, absolutely ruining the melody and key of the song.
All the while he's just grinning so smugly and pleased with himself, like he's saying, Man, I was so good. THANK GOD I offered myself to help those guys out last minute, they would've never gotten any attention without me!

Seriously, seeing him onstage with those guys is like smearing a dog turd onto an absolutely perfect apple pie and vanilla sauce.

Now don't think of this as a fanboy rant over The Police and John Mayer. I'm just saying that Kanye West is a turd.